I quit!

Lately I have had a lot of friends getting into this whole "online dating" revolution. I had done this years ago but decided that perhaps I should give it another shot. Three of my close friends have announced engagements in the last week and a few aquaintances as well. I often get accused of not trying hard enough or not making dating enough of a priority so let the record show that this is me trying!!! Here is my experience...

A few weeks ago e-harmony was having a free commuication weekend so I figured I would give it a shot. After filling out a grueling multiple choice/essay assessment the computer comes back with "no possible matches at this time"....awesome....out of the millions of members on e-harmony there isn't a single person that the computer would find me to be compatible with. Perhaps this was my sign. The next day I log on and find that I have six matches...some of which are "flexible matches" which I assume to be people you could have a possible connection with but are not gauranteed by the e-harmony staff. Great. The way this site works is that you submit pre-selected questions and send them to the matches of your choice. They can then decide to "stop communication" or send back the answers. When they "stop communication" you receive an email stating why they chose to do so...among responses like "pursuing another relationship" or "our backgrounds are too different" there is this one called "other". Over the course of the weekend I send out questions to all the males who are Mormon...(yes sadly this is my only criteria!)...by the end of the weekend I have 32 matches (I guess I got more match worthy as time went on???) to which 28 men decided to "end communication" due to "other" and two more, a week later, have yet to respond. The final two end it due to "pursuing another relationship". Great. Rejected by 28 Mormon men in one weekend who I am convinced that their "other" could actually be translated to "I am a Shallow Hal and I refuse to even respond to women who are overweight"...
So I begin looking at statistics and 70% of men desire a woman who is thin. Well where the heck are the other 30%???? Either they don't use services like e-Harmony or they aren't Mormon...either way I decide I want to find them! More research with my google search engine (by this time we have been developing a relationship with each other...a non-judgmental, silent one...yes I am loving it.) finds me five or six sites advertising a "big and beautiful clientele". Sweet! I feel right at home here....I quickly fill out my profile and matching survey. (substantially shorter than e-harmony....not sure if this is good or bad.) I post the same pictures and within minutes my inbox is flooded with emails from men stating "You are hot" or " I love your pictures!"...(I think my self-image went up 50 points within a matter of 3 1/2 minutes!) Over the next three days they continue to come in and I begin to email or IM selected men....(given the nature of the website I screen with much higher standards) Sadly, not a single one is Mormon....(I see this as a VERY SICK COINCIDENCE) I still talk to about ten of the men who I might add are very attractive and employed and Christian. My profile amongst my eye color and height states MORMON. This is an interesting thing. I get a lot of resposes like "What is it like being Mormon?" or "Are you guys allowed to date non-mormons?" one tells me what he knows about being Mormon and at the end he states "Mormon women are some of the prettiest I have ever seen"...I laugh. So in responding to these emails I offer up a bit of gospel education. Some however, I have found are on the sites for very different reasons than myself just as with any dating site and they merely want to exchange dirty pictures or speak nasty.
I decide that this is a no win situation. The Mormon men won't speak to me because I am overweight and the ones that think I am beautiful and "Can't believe a girl that looks like me is still single" are the ones that I hesitate to get involved with because then you have to deal with all of the explanations of why we don't drink, smoke, have pre-marital relations etc. Don't get me wrong...I am not opposed to a little missionary work but I also don't want to get involved with someone expecting them to change.
I have decided through these experiences that dating is WAY too much work.Perhaps I am selfish because relieved I return to my computer and cancel my worthless e-harmony account and realize that I just wasted three to four hours getting rejected by 28 to complete strangers in one weekend. Somehow I can't make it seem worth it. I do however consider leaving my "big and beautiful" account open if nothing more than getting that small dose of "I'm attractive to someone" feeling.