Sundays...

I love them.

Today was a day. With football in season I find myself spending most sundays alone. It has been good. With many things in my life up in the air, I find joy in these quiet blocks of time when I can turn up the Jessie Funk, Mindy Gledhill and assorted hymns to reflect.

Today in RS the lesson was on a past conference talk given by Dieter F. Uchtdorf. It was on patience. I have heard the talk before but today it seemed to hit me in a very different way. I suppose the biggest reason for this is because I have spent the last six months waiting...patiently. (or trying to) With the task of trying to secure employment in WI, I have had to have a lot of faith. I applied for one job. It was the one I wanted. The one I knew I would do well at. The one I miss. In a failing economy I have people asking about the places I have applied. I respond with the name of one single agency. It is interesting the responses I receive. I get it. I would never encourage my clients to apply for one position and one only. I would probably say, "don't put all of your eggs in one basket." I suppose I just knew it was only a matter of time. However, even with that knowledge it required patience.

I have never been very patient myself. In this talk it mentions that impatience stems from selfishness. I suppose that if this is true (I believe it is) then the cure is selflessness. When I put life in the appropriate perspective, I see that it is someone greater than I who calls the shots. It is selfish of me to want to control it. To want the answers without the cost of waiting. When I am strong enough to surrender control I can be patient. I know that no amount of worrying or concern will hasten things along. It's not my schedule. I can be patient if I know that my future is in the hands of someone more capable, more wise, and more all-knowing than myself. Who wouldn't feel good about that.

I hate to turn this all into ramblings on patience but it hit me so hard today. I was also hit with the need to express a large amount of gratitude for everything that I have been blessed with. Perhaps the single most important is the love that I feel from my Heavenly Father. In the past I have often felt this through the actions and words of friends and family around me. Lately I feel it in the events that have transpired in my life. I am grateful for my family. I have a new nephew today and another addition will be joining our family in the spring. I believe they are already blessed given the family they will be raised in.

Truly blessed.