Angry runner...

"To live greatly, we must develop the capacity to face trouble with courage, disappointment with cheerfulness, and triumph with humility." - President Thomas S. Monson

Throughout my life I have had a fairly easy time reaching goals, completing tasks, making friends. I have always had to work at what I do but it has all been fairly smooth. There have been brief moments where I have had to "fight" for my beliefs or morals. Slightly more often I have come face to face with doubts and fears but after moments of reflection and a desire to succeed, they never last long. Not THIS long. My mind fights daily with my body. The 5am mornings take a toll. I am not a happy person this early. I am not a happy person when I put so much time and commitment into something that yields such few measurable results. I want to quit every day but a switch has been flipped and I know that the only way out of this is through. Today peace came in the form of a magazine article. It talked about our tendency to be less than what we are capable of. It's comfortable. I know for myself if things get hard, or they hurt, or make me grumpy; I try to stay away. I don't want anything rocking this little boat that I am so comfortable in. Stretching beyond our limits is painful. We set ourselves up for rejection and failure...really, who wants to embrace that?! This article had the ability to remind me who I am and what I am here for. I am so thankful for this knowledge. It has the ability to give me confidence and courage but only when I remember it. I am almost to the point of being angry lately. I never felt like an angry person before. I see each day as a near failure because I am not where "I think I should be"...I suppose it is the pessimist in me. I am so thankful for this simple reminder today. I am hoping that tomorrow I can be reminded before I even get out of bed. This anger and disappointment really wears me out...